Ex and i have mutual friends I have mutual friends with my therapist, she even knows my ex girlfriend. Have a realistic perspective on being friends with your ex. Thing is. This weekend is about our friends and their Since then, I have been no contact with him. I ended both of them on good terms but had no real desire to keep in contact. I kinda do the same thing, but I don't tell girls "you can't have male friends", I just watch and see if they have really close male friends, and then I don't date them. My friends post pics of them hanging out with him on their snapchats sometimes. Before you divorce be aware that not only will your husband be your ex, but there is a chance that so will your mutual friends. If this friend hanging with ex and AP is keeping you from healing or at least slowing down your ability to move on it may be time to eliminate that. They hang out once a month maybe and every time they do she begs him to ask about me. I know that she is friends with both him and When you end a relationship, you may not be sure how to deal with mutual friends after a breakup. So, I stopped asking about him as I didn't want him to hear about it and My ex (24M) and I (25F) were within a friendship group that existed for many years before we got together. I come first/ we come first. If i’m friends with my ex. Nah. Some of them were my close friends too. But not only because we played in same club and have mutual group of friends. I have gone no contact with him and am at the point where I have a Twin brother as well although no schizophrenia but struggled with Serious Drug addiction, lifelong Depression and perhaps some Borderline Personality disorder he was on the streets off and on for almost 2 decades, he burned every bridge with every person in our family, our mutual friends, his friends, my friends really anyone connected Since I turned this down our mutual friends have become very close to her. I remind them that first off they I still hang out with select people from the friend group that I see are worth being friends and 2 of those are my ex’s roommates. Now my view on Schwartz/Katie situation: he’s a jerk for treating her so poorly when he told her he would respect that boundary. In order for you to move in successfully you have to have a very clear stance on what has happened. Some friends Mutual friends are key to reestablishing indirect communication with your ex but don’t push any friends to oversharing and picking sides if they don’t want to. 5. One way to have an absolute shit friendship with your ex is to Here's how to stay friends with your ex without making things awkward with everyone else. Her new song “Mutual Friend” — out now via Island Records, from her forthcoming album, Yessie, — follows that philosophy with a blunt message directed at her ex. I have known my ex for two/three years, we dated for four months and broke up just short of a month ago. I personally have few friends. My ex asked mutual friend how i´m doing. We've known each other for 17 years- at this point I more consider him family than an ex But if you have ever broken up and realized that you and your ex have a ton of mutual friends, then you know that the whole process is a lot easier said than done. I am still friends with my ex who is was with for 10 years, both on and off facebook. Good and bad. Without them I have nobody and most of the time it’s fine, but I can tell I’m not nearly as happy as I would be if I still have mutual friends with my ex and sometimes she gets brought up cause "we were cute together". These friends are genuinely nice and caring. It doesn’t sound like your ex did anything wrong here and again all you have to do is tell the mutual friend that you would prefer not to talk about your ex anymore. he finally got with the girl he left me for, which i honestly feel bad for her. Dating your ex’s friend can get tricky and potentially lead to interpersonal issues. So I [30f] have been broken up with my ex [29m] for about 8 weeks now. I am struggling with the perception and feeling that I have become the outsider despite how our marriage ended and what my ex had done. So just this year he messaged me asking to cone visit me and my family because he missed me and I agreed. I met up with said friend on Friday night, and it turns out my ex had a message for me. My ex and I have been separated for about two years and each time he would try to Communicate with me I would tell him off. a person who is the friend of two people who may or may not know each other: 2. I was with my ex for over 25 years. If I cut her out of my life that's 25% of my social life and social support gone. Reply She's friends with two people and I have no mutual friends with those two people Reply [deleted] • Additional comment actions [removed] Reply MantaClam • Additional comment actions. My 4. Yet I always notice him publicly flirting with women on social media platforms but (we have mutual friends) he's never actually serious about dating a girl, going on Ex No Contact is a breakup support group focused on self-reliance and general healing. 2. MUTUAL FRIEND definition: 1. Be brief, exchange all normal pleasantries and get back to the party. Obviously I don't know your ex, but I'm going to take a guess and say she feels the same way that I did/do. Jane and Mike have had mutual friends since university and I actually met her at a party one of those mutual friends was hosting shortly after Mike and I had started dating. Some people have tons of friends so for them having one extra in the form of an ex makes little difference. Reply reply smiles-and-cries • Yes I do, but it's a bit hard for me to reach out to them. I pretty much accepted that those relationships were done along with my ex and I's. That seems cold I am going to see my ex at a mutual friends wedding (this friend actually introduced us in the first place) in a couple weeks. You have to keep in mind that by talking sh*t to your friends, you're talking sh*t to your ex's friends as well. I don't think going to mutual events is worth it. Leaving a narcissist – why I had to let go of mutual friends and start over Narcissistic abuse recovery means losing friends. Q. We broke up two months ago. Premium Powerups Explore Gaming. It's a scenario that many find themselves in, yet few know how to handle adeptly. Reply reply ShooterOfCanons • I need to remember that line! People still bring up my ex from 5 years ago saying they still think we should have gotten married. You must either be friends, or share a mutual server (where you've allowed DMs from server members for that mutual server). Share I once asked a mutual friend how he was doing after we broke up. I'm willing to bet the mutual friend is walking on eggshells the entire time during conversations with you and your ex. But I do not recommend venting to the narcissist’s friends though, that’s my lesson learned I was trying to explain, sorry if I was confusing. There is very very little chance that she is even a friend of a friend of a friend. A woman on Reddit says that her ex asked her to skip a mutual friend's housewarming party because of his fiancée. (50 days to be exact) We’ve been NC since the breakup. It is a small affair (his entire family will be there) and my best friend is going as my date. Move on. I've told them that is seems they are more upset about the breakup than I am. My story is, I'm a guy and I have this childhood friend (lets call him B) whom I have known for 20+ years. By the date of the wedding, we will have been broken up for a year. However, most people who have tried know that being friends with an ex is much easier said than done. It took a while (almost a year) for a mutual of theirs to fully make peace with the reality of what happened, come to terms with who their ex-friend really was, and quietly cut the ex-friend off, too. As she also reacted to Kyle, 55, and Dorit Kemsley‘s separations from Mauricio Umansky, 54, and Paul “PK” Kemsley, 57, respectively, Hi, I have been reading about frenemies and toxic relationships for the last few days online. Catch up with them and ask them how they’re doing. I'm good friends with an ex of mine - we dated for almost a decade when I was 19 and have a lot in common, including friends. To tell you the truth, the breakup made us even closer than we might have been. I’m taking the time to just vent out and I agree about not talking to friends. I was really shocked as never thought of him in this Lisa Vanderpump took aim at her former Real Housewives of Beverly Hills castmate, Kyle Richards, during an interview this week, ahead of the grand opening of her latest restaurant in Las Vegas, Pinky’s at the Flamingo. I also don't like the fact that even though he's apologized for what he did, he's being very defensive and concerned about his reputation with our mutual friends. We have mutual coworkers friends between us. ‍These are all questions that plague our minds when we’re trying to get over a breakup and have the same friends as our ex, but it doesn’t have to keep you on edge. We broke up about 6 months ago and it was very messy. For a while I was tortured by that decision. My ex-partner sent this to me we decided to break up mutually for all the same reasons being mentioned above. Maybe 3. I lost about 98% of our mutual friends in the divorce. Learn more. If he wasn't feeling it, that would've been fine, as things were still developing between the two of us. Yes, you can be friends with an ex but you must NOT HAVE ANY ROMANTIC FEELINGS LEFT FOR THEM. But I can’t seem to act even a little normal We've been broken up for a while now. As a result, the people at the party seem to have to 'choose groups' again. If you have mutual friends with this girl that don't seem to be shunning you, you can always pursue your individual friendships with them if you feel comfortable and like it won't cause too much drama. My point? I wouldn’t write Jocelyn off forever. That being said, some people stay friends with exes as a way to continue the romantic relationship on some level and I'm sure He ended up moving out here a month later, and now he’s becoming friends with my ex and his friend group (they have a mutual best friend). Being upset at the mutual friends because they aren't as upset at the breakup, or actions leading up to it, as you may be. they weren't exactly my friends, more through my ex's connections. he’s going to be the first to move on with some woman from his past. You shouldn’t be socialising with your ex and if mutual friends get in the way, they have to go too. Our guide will show you how to handle the social scene so you can minimize any awkwardness as you move on. 0 coins. and i am still in love with him. In my teen years I watched It's a weekend of events so we will see each other Friday-Sunday. That time destroyed my mental health, nothing I did or had was good enough. completely NC. When I get together with my friends his name is usually brought up into conversation (usually about things they talked about with him or things they just did together). I understand that it's a difficult situation when it concerns an entire friend group and I fully trust my girlfriend is over him, but I can't help feeling uncomfortable about her ex I have been meeting up with a mutual friend here and there and just yesterday he mentioned that she asked him if we have been meeting up and talking. If you want to talk about the end of your friendship, it’s usually best to open up to someone who isn’t close to your I am not The OOP, OOP is u/ThrowRA-192. The best way to deal with mutual friends is to communicate your wishes to them regarding you and your ex. Now, my ex and I are reconciling — which was super unexpected. I have so much dirt It may be just because you are much more likely to notice your ex among the friend suggestions than all the other people. If you have an understanding with your mutual friends that you and your ex don’t want to meet at social gatherings, be flexible. Facebook Mutual Friend with the Ex’s Girlfriend — Part Two So I finally deleted my [] Karas Kitchen June 22, 2023 at 10:22 am | Reply. Why am I getting friend suggestions from and ex who blocked me if we have no mutual contacts? Hi, My best friend of 10 years decided to end our friendship, she told everyone we “broke up” last September 2021. He It is better to treasure the friends you have than to try to punish your ex, or save face, by campaigning to win the loyalties of his or her friends. However, I'm finding it increasingly difficult to be calm about this betrayal. " I agree. Me and my ex work together in the same place and it hurts me a lot but I can't quit my job. While it may feel overwhelming to begin with, it's vital that everyone is on the same page and that there is mutual respect. Nor would I want my friends listening to someone complain about how awful I am. it was only about sex and loneliness. We still have a few mutual friends between us, but they live out of state. My position with this, personally, has been to divest myself of mutual friends after a breakup. It can also act as a litmus test for the strength and trust in your relationship. After we broke up, we both moved into the same building. Also, I don't have any of his contact info in my phone. I don't know which situation I find more awkward. If you and your ex can have honest conversations about your feelings and establish clear boundaries, a friendship may be possible. In May this year 2022 she apologized very sincerely and I forgave her. And, my Twitter account is not linked to my Facebook account in any way. My ex cheated, it was aw I personally wouldn't want a friend coming to me to vent about a mutual friend. The Ex asks about me through mutual friends Help I was in a 3yr relationship and we’ve been broken up for almost 2 months now. The participants may have felt badly about losing those friends, but the loss was not surprising. I have mutual friends with my ex it makes things very weird sometimes. My ex-best friend wants to be friends again after not talking for years, She knows through our mutual friends that we are getting married in 32 days, and I feel like she is realizing that the guy I slept with isn't going away. It also destroys whatever slim prospects you have at a future friendship with your ex. The first step for navigating mutual friends after a breakup is figuring out how everyone feels about the situation, including yourself, your ex, and your mutual friends. She is also one of his mutual friends. My ex and I are progressing to However, know that having mutual friends alone isn’t a good reason to stay in contact with your ex and that if the friendship doesn’t end up working out, it’s not your fault, and your friends won’t blame you for it. Communication mishaps, confusion, and plain forgetfulness might have you wind up at the same party as your ex. It doesn't affect therapy at all, but there were a few honest and transparent discussions that had to happen when the mutual connections first came to light. Reaching out is tricky if you want to get back together, because it’s either you can be just friends with your ex, or you will give them space and move on, and the best one is to work with them and have a mutual understanding if you want to try again. You need to talk to this No, you are not an asshole. I wanted her to be safe, to flourish, to be okay. Venting to friends is healthy and needed. It's not your job to let everybody know what an A-hole your ex is, or the many ways in which he/she sucks. Please read the following (this does not mean your post has been removed): SCAM WARNING: If you are having a problem with your account, beware of scammers who may comment or DM you claiming they know someone who can fix your account, or asking you for money or your login information. there was never really a friendship i think. She screwed you over, not them. Everything ended amicably (b/c I moved out of state) but I’m still worried about any awkwardness, especially if they bring a date. But the problem was, that mutual friends keep updating me on abusive ex’s life thinking i care . That said, you have to move on in a way that makes you happy and helps you heal. I deleted his contact, pictures, blocked him off every social media account, etc. Until a month ago, I could have sent him a friend request, as the button to add friend was there. Before we could, my husband and I ended up working things and out and stayed together indefinitely. I don't want to put the friend in an awkward position but also want to know what the best course of action to take would be before I decide to send my ex an email and risk embarrassing myself further. I took up cycling instead after our breakup so hadn't seen this friend too much. We have mutual friends, who I have kept in contact with. " Seriously do everything you can to block her out of your life. If she truly does want to try to start things up again, she will contact you herself. I also like to point out that the person she's with now is also one of our mutual I had a few mutual friends with my ex. you do not stay friends with your ex unless you have kids together and you have no other choice Odd I just went thru my FB friend list and deleted people that were friends with both of us and for good reason – My ex husband an abusive drunken cheat thief and a liar ( this is the short list Commit to being a better friend to the ones you love. Said friend is getting married and wants both of us as bridesmaids, and wanted the air to be clear before it happens. They have the right to decide for themselves whether they want to be friends with your ex-friend. I’m confident in my decision, but mutual friends have started to ask if I would be willing to hang out with him in group settings so they don’t have to feel like they’re choosing one or the other. 1. If mutual friends are telling you about her, say to them, "I'm trying to heal from this so please don't tell me anything about her. We were into model trains, and watching trains. I understand that we will probably keep seeing her at social events, because of the one good friend and some other mutual friends too. My T and I had never officially met, but we'd both known of each other before I started going to see her. When ending a friendship with mutual friends involved, it’s crucial to plan the conversation carefully. They have her and my kids over once a week (or more) and regularly catch up outside of that each week. One of the things I miss most out of our relationship was the mutual friends I had made and going out together as a big group. If you receive a message like this, block and I knew that he liked me too, because we were always joking that we would end up together, or that we should be at least friends w benefits, cause we get on so well, and also our mutual friend told me, that he liked me. Planning For The Conversation. I was going through the "Suggested Friend" area and someone I follow (and who follows me back) on Twitter was on my "Suggested Friend" list. I don't see a need to. I don't have any bad feelings towards him, but I'm also not looking to shoot the shit with him. It's been challenging for me to navigate the interactions, and I often find myself feeling anxious. Don't talk trash. Me and my ex had a mutual break up, but she's still in my head after months. Reply Well said and well put across OP. Sometimes, the best option is simply to accept what happened and move forward. Very nice blog you hhave here. Help. Regularly bash their ex - or new partner - to their mutual friends. June 27, 2023 at 9:16 am | Reply. Anything apparently, just to see how I'm doing. Grab a pen and paper, pull up a word document, or fire up the notes app on your phone or tablet. We dated for 6 years and we still talk at least 4 times a week on the phone. And my ex being the 4th. Agreed. In this case just say whatever you want. Do not ask mutual friends to stop spending time with your ex-friend, and do not ask them to act as messengers or mediators. At the time of breakup he said that he is no longer feeling it, and after I believe friends should support both parties, invite them to their functions allowing the divorcing couple to behave in a mature and appropriate fashion, but for mutual friends, this is just too much trouble. completely cordial and no bad blood. It’s not unusual to feel hurt See: Facebook Mutual Friend with the Ex’s Girlfriend? – Part One. My friends since childhood are still there. Over the last two weeks, I started to notice that some of my friends stopped approaching me or even saying hi in some cases. and i am honestly so tired of hearing about it. Assuming that these mutual friends will be a support circle. If both parties are open and honest about their feelings and boundaries, it's entirely possible to maintain a balanced dynamic. I’d cut him a little slack and if anything just tell the mutual friend that you’d prefer not to hear about your ex moving forward. It’s really that simple. I gave him time as well and there were times that he will reach out to me first. Now they all treat me like I have a disease! I have a feeling he has started a rumour about me or used some of my texts I sent to him out of context and will attempt to paint me as a crazy bish if I retaliate. Unless one of them is your best mate and you want to pour your heart out. Respecting mutual friends’ boundaries also helps maintain healthy friendships in the long run You can be friends with an ex, but how close the friendship is depends on a lot of factors. It’s a pretty tight group. But as you have said it is / was a tight group of friends. Our members listen, support, and encourage each other on their path to independence. I care deeply for these friends and help with their company when they come through town, but my ex has been coming around to help them lately as well. The dumpee has to find the right balance. But it's possible to still keep those friendships. We've known each other for 17 years- at this point I more consider him family than an ex I feel like friend groups in college/uni are constantly evolving and shifting anyways. I reached out and found out that my ex spread an untrue story of the breakup and about me. If your mutual friends want to remain neutral during the breakup, respect their wishes. I An ex and I ere friends for 6 years before we began dating. If you and your ex have shared goals, such as co-parenting or working We have mutual friends, and last week we did have a dinner with our friends because he was My ex and I have been separated for about two years and each time he would try to Communicate with me I would tell him off. I want to support her, and I want her to be in my life, so of course I said we should still be friends . They don't want to look in the mirror I guess. Yet I always notice him publicly flirting with women on social media platforms but (we have mutual friends) he's never actually serious about dating a girl, going on It made me uncomfortable recently when they planned to go to the beach and almost no one in the friend group wanted to go except her ex and another mutual friend. Sharing mutual friends with an ex means that you will inevitably have to see each other and feel those awkward, uncomfortable feelings. Despite their 2023 breakup, Swift and ex Joe Alwyn still Talking to mutual friends can sometimes help, but tread lightly. We have mutual friends and work together. I would definitely consider them my friends, but I I believe friends should support both parties, invite them to their functions allowing the divorcing couple to behave in a mature and appropriate fashion, but for mutual friends, this is just too much trouble. Being around someone you still have feelings for can keep those Personally I think making friends decide ‘sides’ isn’t fair to anyone. I also do not want to give anyone who regularly spends time with my abuser access to my life. I told her I needed time to think if I wanted to be friends and she "The scenario where our mutual friend hangs our with ex and AP is inevitable. This sort of awkwardness is natural with mutual friends after a breakup or divorce. In my teen years I watched television couples handle Some mutual friends may have to go, lest they become "flying monkeys"—informants who give messages back to your abuser that they can use to further inflict harm. We have no mutual friends whatsoever. It just So my ex and I have the same friends. 'He said his fiancée feels uncomfortable that I would be anywhere close to him My ex and I will be attending a mutual friend’s wedding. By Minty33year, April 26, 2022 in Second Chances . This puts your mutual friends in a really tough spot and makes you look immature and low. Your friends don’t want to hear it, you shouldn’t be saying it, it sounds pathetic and you never come out of it looking good. but that’s about it. School, work & living on different sides of Jersey. 5 months no contact), and it seems our mutual friends still think we're together Personally, as the dumpee dealing with my own heartbreak, I'm not prepared to tell any of them and have been keeping to myself/going to therapy. especially if it was their fault. The analyzing isn't worth it because breakups are hard for both people, and often the one doing the dumping wants to minimize the pain as much as What do you do when you hear that your ex-girlfriend is inquiring about you through mutual friends? Such a situation often stirs a mix of emotions – confusion, curiosity, maybe a twinge of nostalgia, or even discomfort. Here’s another relatable scenario: Example Scenario: \\The Friend Dilemma\\ You may never be the best of friends with your ex again, and that’s perfectly okay. By setting clear goals and expectations, choosing the right time and place, and anticipating possible reactions, you can navigate this sensitive situation with tact and grace. The last 1% is that e'vehad a mutual friend for years and it isn't my place to dictate who he does and doesn't talk to. Now fast forward years later, my ex, my husband, and I all have mutual friends and i see him almost every other weekend. Rest are for socializing and occasionally drinking. another thing is most of my female friends don’t have many other female friends, they [19-21] aren’t in sororities (puts a age on me, college), and have Ex No Contact is a breakup support group focused on self-reliance and general healing. With An ex and I ere friends for 6 years before we began dating. And I’ve gotten very close with the roommates and the other 2 from the friend group. I just avoid any social event I think he might be at, lol. I do not think it's inherently disrespectful to stay friends with an ex, and I give side eye to people who insist that it is. Truly thought it was over but things seem to actually be different this time. Likewise, remember that even the best of friends may make mistakes. Then they can't get fucking mad that I'm being "controlling" and I don't have to deal with this weird 3rd wheel my girlfriend might fuck in a moment of weakness. Here's the deal: my ex and I share the same group of mutual friends. Simple and done. Just because you've been through a breakup doesn't mean you have to stop hanging out with your mutual friends. Reply reply greendandelion0450 • I kind of did but it didn’t work out because both of us didn’t change- I still couldn’t trust her, and she was still neglectful of our friendship and played the victim constantly. It's worked out very well tbh- my fiance gets along well with him and we still have many mutual friends that weren't forced to choose sides. Once the dust settles, approach those friends that seem to be equally devoted to both of you and let them know that you are not expecting them to choose or to stop spending time with your ex. Avoid making your friends pick sides, stay positive, accept your I'm close friends with a long-ago ex. Taylor Swift arrives for the 81st annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton hotel in Beverly Hills, California, on January 7, 2024. subscribers . I do catch up with my friend but not as often as my ex and very I have deleted my ex and most all of our mutual friends. One in particular seems to have taken the position of the 'go between' and if it wasn't for him, I would be none the wiser on a few things. 99% no contact. We liked each other enough to be friends, but we weren't compatible Should I reach out to mutual friends and ask about him? Should I reach out to him directly to see how he's doing? TLDR: I'm wondering if I should reach out to my ex after 2 years of no contact just to see how he's doing. The Post-Breakup: My ex has basically moved on. Consider the impact on all parties involved and be honest about your We have mutual friends, and last week we did have a dinner with our friends because he was going to go back to his college. There is a question of loyalty. Finding something new to do with the time you once spent with your partner We all need support after a breakup, but what do you do when you and your ex have mutual friends? We offer tips for navigating this tricky territory. If friends do not want to I have a Twin brother as well although no schizophrenia but struggled with Serious Drug addiction, lifelong Depression and perhaps some Borderline Personality disorder he was on the streets off and on for almost 2 decades, he burned every bridge with every person in our family, our mutual friends, his friends, my friends really anyone connected Here is my situation. I thought, “Am I being petty But if you have ever broken up and realized that you and your ex have a TON of mutual friends, then you know that the whole process is a lot easier said than done. There is no way that facebook could randomly pick her from the millions of users and suggested her as a friend. Your mutual friends can live happy and productive lives without the information of his evil ways. So me and my ex have been broken up almost a year now, and ever since the breakup neither of us has ever spoken to each other. It may be just because you are much more likely to notice your ex among the friend suggestions than all the other people. My bed was too small (it's a regular double), my taste in TV was awful (we lived apart so it's not like I made him watch X Files), I wasn't interested enough in his hobbies (After 2 hours of hearing about Warhammer You may have friends of friends. My “friend group” consists of my ex (who I still have feelings for) and her friends. She did contact me eventually to "apologize," but it was because one of my besties told her to. Things ended on a bitter note with my ex. I noticed that our mutual friends had been ignoring my messages and invitations to hang out. I never hated her, I never will hate her, because My ex and I somewhat share mutual friends. Simple answer. Here you’ll find some tips for managing those friendships after your The conversation doesn't have to be a long one, but you should let your ex know your intention is to stay civil so you can both enjoy your mutual friendships. They were never your friend. An old friend and I have 18 mutual Facebook friends. 'He said his fiancée feels uncomfortable that I would be anywhere close to him The dumper usually ignores all the mutual friends. I've tried to distract my self by going to parties, hanging out with friends and talking to new people but no she just randomly pops up in my head. Try not to force the issue or expect you and your ex to suddenly become best buds. It means that your ex is still scared to reach out to you directly, so he feels safer speaking to mutual friends. Now is trying to rejoin our circle of mutual friends, and i am struggling with it extremely hard. Mutual friends. We had to have a I’ve had a situation where an ex-friend acted very abusively and sabotaged another person’s relationships out of spite. But overall I do not keep in contact with exes. If anything, I felt it strengthened my relationship with her. If your breakup was amicable, these feelings may subside quickly. I can tell you that I have exactly two close friends but don't need that many. We have a lot of mutual friends and places we used to hang out with them - online (whatsapp groups ec) and offline. Never put your friends in a situation where they have to choose one person over the other. I live in a small, rural town (<8,000 people) and I work in the non-profit network(so does her husband). Don't expect your friends to pick sides. This last sign shows up most when you both have mutual friends after a breakup. I unfollowed her on Instagram and deleted her phone number. I already know I will not be sitting by her, but we ended abruptly just not being on the same page in our lives as she was Only advice I can give you is to cherish the memories you have with your ex-friend, but just be open to forging new relationships. I don't have romantic feelings towards him anymore but we were very close and I still care about him as a person. Regularly looking for reassurance from the mutual friends that they are going to remain friends. Ex No Contact is a breakup support group focused on self-reliance and general healing. It's a very rough situation for your friends to pick sides as you have already figured out. My ex's sister and I have definitely zero friends in common, we live in different countries, have no overlap in our lives/friends. I have 1 ex who I only even think of as an ex when I'm answering questions like this on reddit, because we only dated a few months and at this point we've been friends for decades. Just be happy that these people are still However, having an ex within your group of mutual friends doesn't have to spell doom. She wants to meet for coffee next Sunday, and I really don't want to. I was really shocked as never thought of him in this Sucks but it's reality, I "lost" a lot of mutual friends after the divorce. It has been really hard for me to recover from the fact we've broken up and I finally did but a mutual friend of ours told me that my ex keeps asking about me like all the time. I'm trying to figure this one out. Others have very few friends and giving up a friendship is a big deal. they tell me he’s still messed up about the break up, After I tried getting help from those “Mutual Friends”about the breakup and kinda keeping tabs on my ex I decided I needed to block/ cut off those mutual friends for my well being I may reach out later I may not, but I need Zero access to my ex and if that means losing a few friends so be it. Ex fiancee [32F] of 8+ years broke up with me [32M] via text message ~3 years ago, and disappeared. Reach out to other friends or spend more time with family—temporarily distance yourself from your ex and associated reminders. Their ex’s friends. When I was a kid, I very much liked hanging out with him and playing together and all and his family became friends with my family through us. The ones that aren't connected, have their own families and I feel like I don't really want to reach out to them. I It's been 10 weeks since our BU, I'm currently in limited contact with my ex (we were previously 1. Just Me With . What your going to have to decide, is if you're going to remain friends with people that are still friends with your ex. When there’s unresolved romantic desire, staying friends with an ex can complicate and prolong your emotional recovery process. It’s often the case. This occurrence is The only exception to this was my "best friend" [33F], Jane. I used to confide in a friend but seeing her hang out with him really hurt. The mutual friends were concerned about how we would be around each other Additionally, asking mutual friends about your ex can put them in an awkward position. Obviously, I'm really hurt. My partner is close friends with a long-ago ex or two. Basically studies and polls show most people meet their SO through mutual friends, the issue is most of my friends share the exact friend group I do and I kinda brought them all together. It was a difficult In this current situation of being friends with my ex and it’s so difficult to leave because I’m afraid of not making any new friends. On that note, the one sure-fire way to become a hall-of-famer in the Shitty Ex Society is to badmouth your ex to your mutual friends. Now she just stares at us from a distance from time to time, and they don't talk anymore. I made sure my current bf knew immediately and he met my ex as I was introducing a few other close friends. I bumped into him last week and asked me if I'd like to go for dinner with him sometime. It’s much easier to stay friends with your ex when things ended amicably. • **Mutual Friends**: The more friends two users have in common, the stronger their connection is deemed to be, which increases the likelihood of Facebook suggesting each other. I tired it for so long and I all I got was subtle hints about them seeing other people, how great these new dates were and sly remarks that only I would pick up on. I knew the breakup was inevitable, I saw it from mile away. any long distance ex who tells you you were their best friend is just a lonely person with no actual friends. . Idk that seems a bit farfetched Reply [deleted] • Additional Mutual Friends taking Ex's Side. So just this year he messaged me asking to cone visit me and my family because he missed me and . Good luck to you! And I’m sorry you’re dealing with the pain of ending a friendship and the dilemma of how to share friends with an ex-friend. I see my most recent ex out sometimes since we have mutual friends and we're friendly with each other until he makes it awkward. Mutual friends (16/17 years of friendship) Coins. Thank you for posting to r/facebook. . While mutual attraction or signs he’s fighting his feelings for you might be there, pursuing a relationship within your social circle could strain existing friendships and create tension. If your ex did something to make you angry, look into your heart and see if you can forgive them. I have my doubts if a different previous ex wanted to join your group of friends again if you'd have any issues. You don't owe everyone an invite to everything every My ex became extremely angry that word had gotten out and she was distraught about losing all of her friends one bu one and her only safe space from the difficulties of life was ripped away—and that was never something I wanted to do. You don't want your doomed relationship to forecast your friendships, too. Very long story short, my ex and I were together for 2 years. I was going to be her plus one before she broke it off, but after the couple invited me as well. Reply reply Overwhelming4u • It's hard OP. Valheim Genshin Maybe they chose the ex because they arent ok with your end of the breakup? Reply More posts from r/BreakUps. Sign #7: Your ex asks about you but not to your face. Putrid_Dentist7253 A woman on Reddit says that her ex asked her to skip a mutual friend's housewarming party because of his fiancée. Here is my problem, Im trying to cut down ties to my ex as much as possible. I had a terrible divorce that eventually became amicable, thank goodness, but I moved away as a result and have not been back to the small town I lived in for two years. Reply reply Due-Temperature-7844 • I kid you not I have no mutual servers with this person because I’m not in any servers. Tell your mutual friends to not discuss about your ex. If I felt the slightest bit judged or knew that they were spending time with my ex I had to walk away. Then all of a sudden, the "add friend" button is gone, although there is still a Me and my ex had a mutual break up as well but she also moved away for grad school. But there will be times when you know your mutual friends are hanging out with your ex, and it will feel crappy, but you’ve just got to take a deep breath and realize that they love you, too I've (24F) only been in two serious relationships. But these "mutual friends" all supported and cheered on two people cheating and divorcing their spouses for each other (you can read my history for the ugly details including manipulation). I want to forget but for some reason my brain just refuses. I've been a similar situation when a relationship ended and I wanted so badly for our mutual friends to validate me, agree that he had treated me horribly, etc. You can’t be friends with someone if you’re holding a grudge. Maybe at sometime in the future, once things have really settled down, it could happen. Because I don’t want to have to keep reminding myself that I do love him whole-heartily and My ex asked mutual friend how i´m doing. We have quite a few mutual friends and are in a few Facebook groups where we see each other's posts occasionally. Not everything is forgivable, so if you decide you can’t do that, then you may be better off staying exes instead of trying to be friends. We enjoyed the same hobby and have many friends we did it with, including mutual friend. However, I also knew I didn't want to reconcile. We also kept reaching out to each other (via messages) and checking on each other basically every 3-4 months. My ex [22M] and I [18F] were in a long distance relationship (3yo) and we're in bad terms right now, and we share a group chat with many friends, this is the only friend chat I have. Ex broke up with me two years ago. Now we have barely any mutual friends on fb and i find i am a lot happier for it. Once my husband and I were on a 6 month break before we were married and by ex and I talked about getting back together. Write down every mutual friend you share with your former friend and use your list to contact your mutual friends. Shared goals. “Let’s be friends” is often a cliché tied to the end of most breakups. Hello. These are people I got to know during our relationship, through my ex, being around them now reminds me so much of my past with my ex. She complained about being made to do it to another mutual friend, so I know it wasn't genuine but at this point, I'm not surprised. so we usually talk and joke around as per usual. Venting to his friend just created more supply, more drama and continued involvement with my ex-narcissist, plus it made me look like the crazy person he already said I was. Hey guys. I do not want my abuser to have any access into my life. I have mixed feelings about whether your friends should be friends with your ex again. 5-year relationship ended a couple of years ago and although it took me a long time to get over I'm back in my happy place now and content with m As I said in the title my ex gf turned against me some of our mutual friends from college. With mutual respect and communication anything is possible. They may feel torn between their loyalty to both parties and may unintentionally share biased or one-sided information, causing further confusion and heartache. We both need to regularly see each other on campus cause we have lectures and labs together. I'm babysitting for a friend who also happens to be my ex's best friend, and want to ask the friend about my ex-- specifically, if he would be open to the option of talking to me again. Maybe I am an exception but my ex and I worked really hard to stay friends. a person who is. Some friends were seen as belonging to the ex. I still removed them. the break up still feels pretty fresh, but we have mutual friends. aons bmwds geg bglt oxfqiy nerxeg jtvk nptbo xla gjppkbz